Consistency

... has been a major theme in my life lately. How so? Well, I've now been keeping up my workout routine for almost 3 months straight. Usually, I start a new routine strong then taper off once the novelty wears off. Or I do the minimum amount to feel like I'm a notch above feeling out of shape. My current routine consists of 2-3 TaeBo workouts a week (8 minute, Basic, or Advanced, depending on the amount of time/energy I have), and it has come to mean a lot to me to get it in. It represents appreciating my health by proactively investing in it, it represents real commitment to something in spite of moods, and it represents an inner integrity developed by practicing consistency in my life.

Ok, back to TaeBo... I just did the Advanced workout for the first time last Sunday. It's an hour long and it's tough. But right around the 50 min point, Billy Blanks says, "Anyone can workout when they're fresh. It's that moment when you're tired but you choose to go on that makes all the difference." My legs were burning at this point and I had lost feeling in the mid-section of my body, but I was like, "Billy, I hear ya! Gonna keep pushing." I'm so freaking intellectual sometimes that it's hard for me to just do something, to just close my mouth and do it. It's a constant practice in rising above.

Consistency...

also a theme in the Bible study I'm working through with my small group-- Beth Moore's "Daniel." This was our first week in it (it's a 12 week study), and the past few days the writings have pivoted around the themes of CONSISTENCY and RESOLVE. Daniel and his 4 friends "resolved not to

defile themselves" when they were captured and taken off to an environment completely unfamiliar to them. They weren't affected by the great pressures that surrounded them in Babylon, even as young as they were (around 15 years old, they say), but instead they endured the 3 years of training under a foreign king and were FAITHFUL TO GOD all the while. You know what? They probably had every opportunity to doubt, to believe that life was pretty much over for them. Or to play the victim. BUT THOSE GUYS DIDN'T PLAY THE VICTIM. They trusted GOD and acted boldly out of synch with their surroundings.

Consistency...

Ok, so one big gap in my posts lately has been to share what I've been up to. That's because for the past few months and especially the past few weeks, I've been working a lot of hours. I'm a tax accountant, and we are in the dead middle of tax season up at the office. It is a daily effort to wake up and put in the time and the focus EVERY DAY. To make sure I pay careful attention on the job since I'm very much in the learning phase. To maintain a good attitude. To be made painfully aware that the things in life I feel like I "need" are actually just distractions.... this developed out of having to clear pretty much everything off of my plate so I can focus and successfully manage my responsibilities at work. It wouldn't have worked if I didn't focus hard. Things I realize that life goes on without: getting a haircut every 6 weeks, knowing what's on TV, knowing what the latest news stories are, buying new clothes, going to the grocery store every week, even doing laundry every week, being on your cell phone all the time (I limit checking mine to my bathroom breaks... meaning, yes, that I update my twitter status from my phone and even check comments on this blog while in the bathroom. It's a nice momentary escape.), even seeing your friends. And that last one is hard. Because I'm a relationship-oriented person. I thrive on getting to know people and hearing what's going on in the lives of my friends and family. This has been really hard. I have had very limited communication with my family, all the while a relative has passed away... someone who I saw in December, healthy and full of life. I remember a short phone call with Mom two weeks ago to tell me that Carey was given one to six months to live. I was in line at Starbucks in Tyson's Corner, and my mind was completely disconnected from the news I was hearing through the phone. Then, fast forward one week to last Sunday, and I hear that Carey died. My dad tells me, then he hands the phone to my mom as she walks in the door getting home from the hospital. I listen to her as her voice breaks.... then kinda just sit there as 1001 thoughts and emotions flood after I hang up the phone. So my heart was pretty heavy on Sunday night, but like every other close to the weekend, Monday morning rolled around again... time to start a new week. I hadn't had time to catch up with people before I dove into the work week. With a smile on my face despite how uncollected I felt. Because there are challenges every day, and I know that I can't let my foot slip and allow anything to distract me from solutions at work and all the blessings in my life.

I don't mean to sound like I've got the weight of the world on my shoulders... I certainly don't. My job is a blessing, and Carey's life is something to celebrate.

But I do want to drive a point home. Consistency, for me, is all about trust. I realize that I can only do so much to control the world around me. I'm not superwoman. I can't guarantee that I'll never get hurt. Because I will. But I choose to trust that God knows what He's doing, and he sees my little life and my little struggles. I don't care to conquer the world, I promise that wouldn't satisfy me. What does give me a peace that runs bone-deep? Well, my constant prayer to God is that He creates in me an unshakeable faith, deepened EVERY DAY through consistently and joyfully applying things I know to be true. I talk a big talk, yes, but the joy doesn't come until I go out and actually take those steps of faith. Otherwise, these words are just hot air, or in this case, just 12 point Times New Roman characters on an amateur blog.